Monday, March 24, 2008

happy easter and help me get laid

that wasn't meant to be a pun on easter eggs. we don't do puns and we most definitely don't say 'no pun intended' after clearly using one and hoping everyone gets how smart and witty we are. people are so lame!! real post continues below:

we were invited to gaysin's house for easter lunch today. the food itself was decent even though gaysin hadn't cooked. he did set the table beautifully though. other notable things he did - hire a jesus movie and purchase a 5 layer mother-load chocolate cake. yes, apparently such a thing exists. we came pretty close to actually watching the jesus movie. if i hadn't pointed to the other dvd on the table just in time and said "wait, is that the new anne hathaway movie you have there? omg mummy really wanted to watch it. didn't you mummy?" we would so have been watching jesus and his entourage. the anne hathaway movie turned out to be boring as hell. jane austin's story supposedly. mother argued it was jane eyre's story while aunty claimed it was jane bronte's story. now you and i know no such person exists. aunty on the other hand isn't as brilliant and so the two argued until about fifteen minutes into the movie when someone referred to the protagonist as ms. austen thereby bringing some much needed silence to the room. aunty however continued to maintain a rather confused look on her face until gaysin figured out what it was and turned on the subtitles after which everyone breathed a sigh of relief. ooh ooh i have to say here that gaysin received a very suspicious phone call during lunch from a kevin person. his voice got all high and i got all curious. by the way i haven't yet directly asked brother about my gaysin theory. he will occasionally look up from one of his paintings to declare that the person on tv sounds exactly like gaysin and the person on tv is invariably a gay guy.

remember how i told you about brother's random drug confession to me the other day? well now he keeps asking if employers here require drug testing. that and he's been talking a lot of crazy lately. like the other day in the middle of conan he pulled out his guitar and started singing stupidly and then paused to demonstrate the lowest sound the guitar could make and how it was related to om and how that explained how the universe worked or something. i don't know if i should be more worried for his health or more saddened because it has taken him less than two months to cultivate such friendships in the neighbourhood while his sister who has been here much longer barely recognizes the neighbours. except the ones with the annoying kids who think we all live in sound proof apartments. anyway i tuned out halfway through his very strange conversation. that's the one cool thing about brother. you don't have to actually be listening for him to keep talking. he wont try to quiz you in the middle unlike mother who will, every couple of minutes.

for those of you who have been concerned for a while now about your favourite blogger's health and have recommended that she get laid, i will say this - i am trying. remember r? he would be, to refresh your memory the only hot boy at the office, the same one i was unsure whether it would be appropriate to have a crush on. now ONLY six months later, just when i might be transferring to a different location, i have decided that he is in fact totally crushable material and it would in fact be perfectly acceptable for us to *gasp* make out. so yeah to quote a famous dp contributor - i will be looking into the matter. [certain jokes you will only get if you are fortunate enough to have permission to the sicrit blog] anyway bm has very kindly offered me some advice on office flirting. i will be attempting to try some of it in the coming week. for your part you can pray to whatever god or restricted substance you pray to for some type of miracle. i wouldn't try jesus. for fairly obvious reasons he isn't talking to me. and for the record i was totally planning on going to church today but stuff came up.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

I saw 27 dresses and that desi dude is totally doable. I ALSO! Anyway,if you need any tips on flirting with the crushable boy at office,ask me!!

haha
Kangana

Anonymous said...

hehe ;)do tell if the advice works the other way around too :) some of us have tried prayers to all sortsa substances ..no cigar though :(

-Bala

Bhel Puri & Seekh Kabab said...

Being from the Walker sect, I will pray to my god Johnnie for you, while imbibing the sacrament:

"Hear ye,
hear ye,
R shall rise,
and he shall rise
for Pri"

Pri said...

thank you kind sir for that very uplifting comment.

khal said...

Is BP&SK leaving double meaning messages?

hee hee hee

Priyanka D said...

Totally agree with kangana.. the dude is sooo doable. But which anne hathaway movie was this?
Oh, on that crushable dude thing - flirting, aiming to make out, trying to get laid? - my advice for your asking ;)

Shoonyata said...

yr hotness wl attract many...but members of the office tribe?? I wd steer clear.
shd encourage yr bro too..it cd keep him away from the dark side of the moon.

kavitha said...

om/aum/amen/amin to the getting laid part :D

ps: but but but R has a kid...!

Aareet Krsna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
traveller said...

No office romance.. no office sex.. strict no no!

Bhel Puri & Seekh Kabab said...

@khal- "double meaning"? *shakes head sadly*, I was merely referring to Easter and our Lord Jesus Christ, who has risen for all of us.

khal said...

@BP&SK: Sorry, I thought you meant he was going to rise to the occasion in a different way.

Sorry, I have a dirty mind. What to do? We are like this only.

Javits J.R said...

Wow. This is one interesting post.

Pri said...

bhel puri: seriously? i totally thought you meant something else which is why i thanked you for the 'uplifting' comment.

khal: i guess it's just you and me with the filthy minds.

Bhel Puri & Seekh Kabab said...

Lol, you guys are too easy. I was going for the intended pun that Pri so likes. Dayum, it's no fun when you have to explain.

khal said...

saala ch*****a now he's backing out.

wickedtaurus said...

since Jesus isn't talking and Mohammed favoring only burqa'd eggs, shiva linga it is. Pliss to follow the link for (zee)luring instructions ;)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=orCdlQ35Cg4&feature=related

almostinfamous said...

ah blasphemy is the new black i see. how wonderful!

walker sect gets ripped off for their devotion, as compared to the cults of daniels and beam.

Bhel Puri & Seekh Kabab said...

@khal - "backing out"? No, that happens later, after the rising. And yes, that is a double-meaning comment. As was the first one. Peace. :-)

Bikerdude said...

Aa very nice. Now please post quickly quickly I say. Daily Im coming and seeing same to same post means what is this.

Stribeck said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Karan said...

@ Pri:

Not that I don't agree with Bikerdude.

Karan said...

Oh, that "stribeck" was me too.

Karan said...

@ Bikerdude:

Any shame you have?

What right do you have to post a comment like that?

Bikerdude said...

Karen: Don't take tension ma. Full I shamelessly put off, go see. Some rubbish it is. Diagram also useless.

Yes hello Pri, how it is? Thank you.

I love Lucy said...

Any luck?With the best laid plans?

Anonymous said...

I think you should do it with Mr.M
Goat sounds a lot of fun.

James said...

Damn , I don't know which is worst... Jesus movies or Ann Hathaway.
The only reason I stumbled across this page was searching my buddy "Gaysin"... I thought he was the only one.
But good luck getting laid and all that.