Saturday, December 20, 2008

i have a new post for you but following the request of a fellow blogger mentioned in said post i have had to use the sicrit blog to publish it. see you there?

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

blogging during a recession is hard. especially if you're a banker. this is when you dig into your savings also known as your gmail draft folder and copy paste some really old bs for the amusement of your blaudience in hopes that they will still love you and send you fan mail. mera saath doge blaudience?

to the person who googled "what does it mean when a tulsi plant dies" and was directed to my blog which was of no help: it means you need to water it fool. also if you rotate around it singing 'om bhur bhuvah svah' with a ba like person that helps too.

i met this lady today who is clearly obsessed with all things desi. she told me she goes to a masaale bhangra class. whatever that is! when she walked in it smelt like she had dunked herself in a tub of sandlewood oil. she asked if i knew how to do mindi. i was like um bindi?? and she was like no no mindi, like for your hands and i was ohh mehendi!! i've had it done before but i don't know how to do it and she was like oh well i'm getting it done this weekend for the first time, i'm so excited and i was like oh excellent.

see now there's this pressure to bring up something mindi bindi yoga or bhangra related every time i see her or she'll be disappointed. damn it i think i liked it better when everyone assumed i was hispanic. no no take that back. we don't want to go there. i don't want to be attacked again by some old hispanic couple who are ashamed to think i have chosen not to learn my native tongue. talking about people who love desi culture i met this super fun hair stylist recently who loves desi music. apparently he goes on you tube and searches for indian music and then dances or gives his roomate a relaxing massage depending on what plays. i swear this is what he said. other things he told me: that i look like the sort of person who could own my own business empire some day. i had almost decided to tip him well when he ruined it all by saying this business would have to be something boutiquey. all this two minutes after meeting me. also he told me his entire life story. his dreams for the future. and also that my hair was in terrible need of moisture and that i had come just in time for him to save it from dying a horrible death.

me singing along to the radio: hand me a sandwich..... sandwich......sandwich

concerned coworker: um that is not what they're' singing.

me: it's not?

cc: no! it's "my heart is damaged.......damaged.....damaged..."

me: no way! really?

cc: um yaa!

song in question by danny dee cane also known as p diddy's triplets.

i went to the mall today to get my eyebrows done. this threading thing seems to really be catching on here because there's always a line at the threading place. they have this system where you sign in and hang around till your name gets called or you sign in, walk around the mall for a bit and then come back and wait around until your name gets called. so that's what i did today except when i got back there was only one lady doing someone's eyebrows and this other pregnant lady was sitting in the empty chair i guess assuming she was next. i had just gotten back in line and this other lady, the one who i really like to get my eyebrowns done by came back and so naturally she looked in the book and called out the next name which was mine. pregnant lady looked like she had no intention whatsoever of getting up. eyebrow lady then showed her the book where clearly her name was after mine. pregnant lady was now glaring at me. still sitting mind you, but glaring. so were a few other people in line. almost to say you're not seriously going to make this poor woman get off the chair so you can get your eyebrows done first. suddenly i was the villain. people were mumbling and shaking their heads. i was like screw you all. i need to be someplace so i sat down as soon as prego wobbled off the chair. i mean just because someone's knocked up doesn't entitle them to get ahead of the line. see. there i go again. doing my civic duty. fighting for equality. yay me.

quick personal updates: i was almost deported. i manged to survive that.
while mother is out of the country brother is slowly turning the house into a homeless person/animal shelter.
gaysin has pierced both his ears and gotten a ghastly tatoo for his upcoming trip to india. im hoping he will put pics up on orkut.
i believe i saw santa today. the real santa. there was something about his eyes.

p.s. prabhu, yes it's okay to leave comments for posts written in 2007. i still see them.

p.p.s. happy birthday bikerdude. congratulations on turning the big 40.

i have more silly drafts sitting around. i may copy paste some more based on popular demand.