Saturday, April 28, 2007

My very own Sindhi friend

Karen talks about the rain:

Ahhh..i want this smell to be bottled...like in an after shave or something....it would be nice....i think....i hope... Would a guy smell nice if he smelt like rain? or is it just better in the mud?

Karen listens to me bitch about certain person:

karan: He sounds like a Hindi chooth
Pri: No Karen he's a south Indian boy
karan: Oho! it doesn't matter ... and then the QUOTE of the century...
"Anyone can be a Hindi chooth!"

Karen gets drunk and highly philosophical:

karan: Ahhh, I've been silly enuff for one night...done all the silly-ness i could...it killed my high u know...brought it down so badly...i hate it when people/things kill my high. You know it takes a lot of effort to get there and then they so easily kill it ...it's pissing off in a way rather, very pissing off... but today, I killed it myself, so drastically... it's unbelievable...

Karen talks about his love for cake:

karan: i got back from dinner a while back...was in the mood for a late night drive... but no company. Coming?

priya: wat phaar u r needing company?

karan: to eat cake.

priya: u r naat to be having CD players in your car aa?
mmmmmmmmmmmm
cake?
i want cake; chocolate mousse cake from Sweet Chariot

karan: yes, but it's always over
bastards!!!

priya: have u tried the chocolate mousse cake from SW?
it has cake and mousse!
mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

karan: it's ok.
Oreo cheese cake from Spiga is better
or bulls eye from Taj
aah..
or the rich chocolate from Fresco's
mmmm...
i think i should get married to that dame with the dessert shop in fresco's

priya: wtf is Fresco's?

karan: also, i will make her stop the carrot cake

priya: yes yes
we must do this

karan: who the fuck would want to eat carrot cake?

priya: carrot cake is the biggest insult to cake ever

karan: it's like vegetarian food.

priya: ya ya
wtf?

karan: yeah, wtf?
and she puts small carrots on top with cream... and some ugly green colour. [and then the quote that made me proud to be friends with Karen] ...
"What is the point of eating cake made with healthy stuff?"

Karen talks about Home Delivery:

karan: It's my new aim in life to try and get everything home delivered...like i got the guy to come home and fix the stereo in the car and change the seat covers and i made the dude from the showroom come home to take measurements for new suit.

priya: suit?
for the Sindhi wedding?

karan: Yeah. engagement
I get Chung's to home deliver ONE soup and they actually do, for 40 bucks but they still deliver for me.

priya: You know my Chung's story no?
So one day i was super hungry and greedy and i really wanted Chinese food from Chung's but i also wanted Marble Cake from Casa Picola and u know how
close they are, i mean same parking lot and all. But Casa's wont deliver. The BASTARDS! So anyway i asked the Chung's guy if he would mind picking up the dessert from Casa's and bringing it to me along with my order and that i would pay him. The choothling refused. So mean no?

Karen talks about his favourite streets in Bangalore:

karan: Yeah, Lavelle road and Church street
i like callin it Lav - lee road, like the Hindi chooths

priya: me too. heeeee Church st has such yummy restaurants
RR
mmmmmmmmm
Bheemas
mmmmmmmm

karan: Taika...where i got smashed

priya: is it new?

karan: and proclaimed my love for every person there

priya: it sounds like some Japanese hookah/hooker joint

karan: Taika is 3 years old

priya: like who?
who have u proclaimed love for?
TELL

karan: to Hari

priya: tell tell
eouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

karan: to Lavanya

priya: heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

karan: to Nayo
to Sandy
to Rahul
to unknown mozzie boy who helped carry me to valet.
And i fell on the road and they couldn't lift me so the bastards left me there and decided to bring the car and i was on the wet road for 20 min lying down and then they dragged me.

priya: heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

karan: and i had bruises on my stomach

priya: omg
heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
oh paapa

karan: and my arms hurt like mad

priya: heeeeeeeeeeee

karan: and they brought me home and the bitches took video and pics

priya: was your mother disappointed in your unsindhilike behaviour?

karan: she was not in town but i still got the lecture later on the phone.

Karen talks about his Male stalker:

Oh, and talking about stalkers - I have this weird dude (how much I hoped it was a dame) that sends me blank SMSes everyday since sometime now - sometimes 3/4 times a day - at first I thought it's one of those types of people that don't use the keypad lock on their phones and the first thing on the menu is "Write message" but then I figured I can't be the first name on the phone - my name starts with 'K' but then again I was confused if the person stored them in Last Name, First Name format - but then I figured no phone that has Last Name, First Name format actually has "Write Message" in the beginning - besides if he/she had the common sense to use Last Name, First Name format then he/she would probably know how to use keypad lock.

So anyway, I now believe that I have a stalker - and today I decided to blank call and see who it was. I called from the office number and some "yenu magga" types answered with a "hello, yaaru beku" annoying voice. Can't tell you how pissed off I was.

And no, you're not blogging this. [Oh but i am.]

Karen googles 'mundedu':

Oh, I Googled it. It means bastard - in some slang.

Kulla mundedu (Short bastard)
Dhadi mundedu (Fat bastard)
Hucha mundedu (crazy bastard)

Pri: Good work Karen.

Karen is confused about the day of the week:

All of yesterday I was under the impression that it was Friday and I've been really looking forward to the weekend. Was super excited about today (which I thought was Saturday) coz I thought I'd leave office early and I'd have a two and a half day weekend (Oh, Monday is holiday for Ugadi). I only realised it was fuckin' Friday after I reached the office. Can you imagine how pissed off I felt? Huh?

Karen's views on World Hunger/Starvation:

Haffy lenching. Tell me what you had. You always ignore this question of mine off late. Somehow I feel happy when I know people eat good food. It also makes me want. Like five minutes back I suddenly started starving. Hmmm....

Karan learns about Easter:

Eh, but he rose later no, so how did they know in advance that he'll rise to call it Good Friday? Or did they name it much later??


No offence to any Sindhis or Hindhi chooths.
RBR: This does not mean i'm in love with Karen.
Karen: RBR is not the 'gay guy i have a crush on' from previous posts.

12 comments:

Karan said...

See Pri you've scandalized everyone, no one's commented.. You should've taken my advice.

kuvempu said...

Kulla mundedu (Short bastard)
Dhadi mundedu (Fat bastard)
Hucha mundedu (crazy bastard)

kuvempu.... revisited said...

sorrah....
karan mundedu (hairy bastard)

Soupie said...

I comment.
Karen youre turning into my favourite Virtual Sindhi".
Don't pick on my typos ok!

Karan said...

@ Soupie:

I am a real Sindhi you know... What do you mean by 'Virtual' Sindhi??

Karan said...

@ Bhatath:

Stop mocking the 'Sorrah!'

I like it. Stick to your 'OMG' and gasp. :)

Karan said...

@ KB, Sid, Walrus, The Bride, Drama Queen and the other people reading this blog:

Comment (nice things) about this piece I say.

Pri said...

@Karen: wtf? get your own blog betch!

soupie said...

@karen:It's because everything's VIRTUAL,virtually!

Karan said...

@ Soupie - you definitely took the wrong pill dame.. Are you "the one" ?

@ Pri - Give me my few minutes of glory in peace, will ya?
(Shhh... She's flirting back de, come on.. :) )

Anonymous said...

great post. I would love to follow you on twitter. By the way, did you guys hear that some chinese hacker had busted twitter yesterday again.

Anonymous said...

interesting read. I would love to follow you on twitter. By the way, did you guys know that some chinese hacker had busted twitter yesterday again.