Wednesday, December 17, 2008

blogging during a recession is hard. especially if you're a banker. this is when you dig into your savings also known as your gmail draft folder and copy paste some really old bs for the amusement of your blaudience in hopes that they will still love you and send you fan mail. mera saath doge blaudience?


to the person who googled "what does it mean when a tulsi plant dies" and was directed to my blog which was of no help: it means you need to water it fool. also if you rotate around it singing 'om bhur bhuvah svah' with a ba like person that helps too.
***


i met this lady today who is clearly obsessed with all things desi. she told me she goes to a masaale bhangra class. whatever that is! when she walked in it smelt like she had dunked herself in a tub of sandlewood oil. she asked if i knew how to do mindi. i was like um bindi?? and she was like no no mindi, like for your hands and i was ohh mehendi!! i've had it done before but i don't know how to do it and she was like oh well i'm getting it done this weekend for the first time, i'm so excited and i was like oh excellent.

see now there's this pressure to bring up something mindi bindi yoga or bhangra related every time i see her or she'll be disappointed. damn it i think i liked it better when everyone assumed i was hispanic. no no take that back. we don't want to go there. i don't want to be attacked again by some old hispanic couple who are ashamed to think i have chosen not to learn my native tongue. talking about people who love desi culture i met this super fun hair stylist recently who loves desi music. apparently he goes on you tube and searches for indian music and then dances or gives his roomate a relaxing massage depending on what plays. i swear this is what he said. other things he told me: that i look like the sort of person who could own my own business empire some day. i had almost decided to tip him well when he ruined it all by saying this business would have to be something boutiquey. all this two minutes after meeting me. also he told me his entire life story. his dreams for the future. and also that my hair was in terrible need of moisture and that i had come just in time for him to save it from dying a horrible death.
***


me singing along to the radio: hand me a sandwich..... sandwich......sandwich

concerned coworker: um that is not what they're' singing.

me: it's not?

cc: no! it's "my heart is damaged.......damaged.....damaged..."

me: no way! really?

cc: um yaa!

song in question by danny dee cane also known as p diddy's triplets.
***


i went to the mall today to get my eyebrows done. this threading thing seems to really be catching on here because there's always a line at the threading place. they have this system where you sign in and hang around till your name gets called or you sign in, walk around the mall for a bit and then come back and wait around until your name gets called. so that's what i did today except when i got back there was only one lady doing someone's eyebrows and this other pregnant lady was sitting in the empty chair i guess assuming she was next. i had just gotten back in line and this other lady, the one who i really like to get my eyebrowns done by came back and so naturally she looked in the book and called out the next name which was mine. pregnant lady looked like she had no intention whatsoever of getting up. eyebrow lady then showed her the book where clearly her name was after mine. pregnant lady was now glaring at me. still sitting mind you, but glaring. so were a few other people in line. almost to say you're not seriously going to make this poor woman get off the chair so you can get your eyebrows done first. suddenly i was the villain. people were mumbling and shaking their heads. i was like screw you all. i need to be someplace so i sat down as soon as prego wobbled off the chair. i mean just because someone's knocked up doesn't entitle them to get ahead of the line. see. there i go again. doing my civic duty. fighting for equality. yay me.
***


quick personal updates: i was almost deported. i manged to survive that.
while mother is out of the country brother is slowly turning the house into a homeless person/animal shelter.
gaysin has pierced both his ears and gotten a ghastly tatoo for his upcoming trip to india. im hoping he will put pics up on orkut.
i believe i saw santa today. the real santa. there was something about his eyes.
***


p.s. prabhu, yes it's okay to leave comments for posts written in 2007. i still see them.

p.p.s. happy birthday bikerdude. congratulations on turning the big 40.


i have more silly drafts sitting around. i may copy paste some more based on popular demand.


26 comments:

Narendra shenoy said...

Really enjoyed this! Cutting edge stuff. "what does it mean when a tulsi plant dies"! LMAO.

I vote for more!

??! said...

You know we always love you, right? Even when you're gone, we're filled with this "that Pri, so fun she is no? Maybe she'll come back today. Oh, so not today also? Oh well, we'll wait till tomorrow. But we love her" feeling.

Also, Bikerdude turned 40? Seriously? Dude, you just totally uncooled him.

frissko said...

another vote...pliss to post more silly drafts for public welfare...

Anna Bond said...

waat yaaa.. you rolled over a preggy woman? what if that 'basri hengsu' had "shaapa haaku'd" you?

Susa said...

Woo hoo, you're back! And of course we love you. You cant go to a hair stylist without a funny blogable incident happening :)

Gauri Patil said...

one more vote

Gradwolf said...

hahaha i vote for unfinished drafts as posts from next time!

~vagabond~ said...

You mean to say you had all these phaboolus drafts and you didnt post earlier? tch. tch. Plis to be digging into your savings and pasting old bs more regularly.

Prashanti :) said...

lol @ what does it mean when a tulsi dies !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! good uses of google, I must say !!!! go ahead girl....do the ctrl-c ctrl-v !!!!


Prashanti

ggop said...

Tulsi ki maut triggered off such results?!

Oh btw, I'm 39 weeks pregnant myself and I call BS on people glaring at you for making it to your own threading appointment. Let prego lady find another chair. WTF?!

Anonymous said...

Till the Previous comment, I had no clue why people were landing up in your blog searching for tulsi(I thought of the plant).

I have been reading your posts only for the last month or so and commenting for the first time but please to post any drafts. please:)


-Sachita

GB said...

Old people also men, like prego people they want speshul treatment. EVEN when they can actually stand and all and have maximum energy to make your life miserable. Pahhh. All this sanskar naansense.

Anonymous said...

One more Vote!! and this is not for the drafts, its for you coming out of the hibernation...

Anonymous said...

Commiserations on not being deported. Welcome back.

slomoninja said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
slomoninja said...

You know when people on the internet say LOL when they only mildly amused? I was doing that, until I saw the To-do list.

LIRL (Laughing in Real Life).
Redundant acronyms FTW.

Crap - I suck at this.

maxdavinci said...

i second, third and fourth all.

If this is the drafts, then lets have em all...

moody crab said...

finally :) more drafts post maadi pls..

Prabhu said...

"masaale bhangra"?? is it some kind of mujra or wat?? heehe..

SpaceMonkey said...

BikerDude turned 40??!! Geez. Didn't look a day over 35 in his profile pic. Ah well, whaddayaknow.

Pri said...

space monkey: no no i lied. paapa boy is full yeng only.

Prats said...

I didn't google for dying tulsi plant tips...thank god!!!
I would have had to read " aiyoo paapi...sumne hogi neeru haaku"
enjoying the drafts in progress....are there more like this???
put them on....bring on the cheeers...

Akshatha said...

pri.. just loved it.. super agi baritheera! keep writing.. :P

Nashe^ said...

LOL danny dee cane!

you made it so weird from Danity Kane.

Bikerdude said...

aye you bleddy. 40 itseems. Im 51 ok? ok.

PS: what a beauteous blogs u put nowadays ma. so much more fun than those I watched some choththe serial on tv ones thu.

Anonymous said...

hahaha this is hilarious. You made me laugh out loud with the sandwich thing :)



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