Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Miss Universe wheeeeeeee

You can also read this here.

So Miss Universe was on last night. Did you watch? Did you? Did you? No???? Why? Cause you think it’s lame and derogatory to women? Or because its against your culture? You’re freakin insane! It is one of THE most entertaining shows ever!!!

I thrive on the clichéd speeches and the fake heart holding and the pretend confusion [read - stalling for time] while the translator is translating. I’ve watched these pageants since I was a kid; even before Rai and Sen won. It's also a fabulous way to discover new countries you never knew existed. Turks & Caicos – Really?

Also if you're lucky you might get to see someone trip. You wait with baited breath. It’s impossible you think, for all the 77 of them to make it across that super shiny floor in those high high heels and humongous dresses. Last night however was like winning the lottery. Miss USA didn’t just trip, she landed on her ass. It was the most hilarious thing I’ve ever seen. The crowd laughed and then booed when she was put through to the next round [sympathy vote? or maybe it was because every effing judge was an actor from some American TV show].

In the end Japan won the crown and i thought she completely deserved to win mostly becauase of her amazing ability to walk the way she did [Also because she was completely nuts.. but in a good way. She giggled and made strange faces but not like in a fake pageanty way] She did this amazing dance/walk thing during the swimsuit round while everyone else including Miss India walked like Zombies. [Seriously Pooja Gupta moved like a Zombie the whole time and then she suddenly turned around with this seductive look. It was absoulutely hilarious. It reminded me of the Zoolander look.] I’ll forgive her though since she was so pretty. And pretty people deserve another chance…you know like Paris Hilton. Free Paris Hilton! Free Paris Hilton!

Ooh also this year the National Costume round was wayyyyyyyyy more over the top than it normally is. It was like a Drag Show with wings and flowers and trees and rainbows. Remember this guy from America’s Got Talent? I swear I spotted him in the middle. And then again at the end.

Miss India unfortunately didn’t make it to the final 5 and we very sadly missed out on her public speaking skills. No, not because she speaks wonderfully and would have taken the crown but because she talks like a 12 year old. The final 5 didn’t disappoint though inspite of the fact that no one mentioned Princess Diana or Mother Theresa. Also what was with the Donald Trump booing? Not that I minded or anything but he owns the bloody thing!


Anonymous said...

i didn't watch it last night but Miss USA FELL? WHY WASN'T I INFORMED.

Hehe, right on her arse eh? Well that's the best thing ever. I did however look up Miss Japan, and she's alright, not bad!

Miss India - sorry Pri. Bone ugly. SRSLY.

Anonymous said...

I sooo loved watching it. I was on the floor laughing when Japan answered what it was that she learnt in her childhood..
Why cant it be simple like - My Mom hit me once for taking the milk glass out of the kitchen and dropping it on the carpet. The lesson I learnt is that I should not do things like that in the open.

Pri said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pri said...

@coco captive: howdu ree. correkt! Or "this one time i swallowed a bubble gum and my mother told me this huge bubble would burst out of my tummy or this one time i ate chalk and my mother said i would turn into powder or this one time i ate mud and my mother told me to live in the garden with the plants.

jeez my mother was mean!
and i've always had terrible eating habits!

Me said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.