Books make me Loony

This evening after i got done reading 'The interpreter of maladies' I felt very dreamy. I made my Pillsbury rolls extra carefully and i thought my fingers moved very artistically as they rolled/folded [?] the dough. I also noticed that the smell reminded me of gulab jamun dough and then i started dreaming of jamuns and that reminded me of Bhagathrams which reminded me of Commercial street and then i got sad because i realised that its been over 19 months since I've been back home. But then i watched the television for a while and ate my dinner rolls with strawberry jam and i felt better.

p.s If any of you have read the book what was your favourite story?

An eye opener

So while the rest of you had a regular day doing your regular things someone somewhere had an eye opening experience. My good friend Soupie [who might as well co-author this blog with me] made a discovery yesterday in her bathroom of all places. Supposedly she is in the habit of checking all corners of the bathroom for strange objects that could possibly be hidden cameras. In her words "No Pri, i always search the rooms and toilets for hidden cameras...you have to you know ...especially when you're moving in with boys." So yesterday our good friend actually spotted a strange looking object which she claimed looked very much like a camera. And so she decided to test it. "It looked like a camera at first so i kept it near my eyes, looked deep into the camera like object and pressed the button." Only it wasn't a camera it was a *drum roll* ...........................Air Freshener!

I went: OMG! Please tell me you're joking.
She went: No Pri, I'm not but my eyes do smell nice now and they're refreshed grrrrrrrrr...

Dont go :(

I just saw this. The article states that Kumble had made the decision before the World Cup but I hadn’t heard about it till just now when I saw the tiny caption on MSN India under ‘More on the World Cup’. The news didn’t even make the main Headlines box right on top. ‘Australia beat the Windies’ it tells us. Duh! I could’ve told you that yesterday.
I’m not ready for Kumble to go. He’s one of those special cricketers from my generation. He’s always been around. I can’t blame him though. He hasn’t really been treated well especially over the last few years with Harbhajan being the preferred spinner. Kumble’s always been a match winner for us and a true gentleman, someone every Bangalorean and every Indian will always be proud of.

Dekho Baarish ho rahi hain ... its raining its raining its raining

One of my favouritest songs i love to hate composed and SUNG [ugh] by Anu Malik when he first tried his hand at 'Indipop'. Hopefully the mood hasn't been completely ruined. Here's more pictures from that rainy day. [They were taken on a camera phone and i dont know the first thing about photography so dont judge]

She sat by the lamp reading her new book stopping every now and then to smell the pages, finding it harder to concentrate on every new short story when the previous one was still fresh in her mind, distracted by the new colourful Easter socks she had found on sale earlier that day now wondering why they were even on sale when it wasn't Easter yet, looking up every now and then at the muted television where they were discussing the World Cup she no longer had any interest in.

Random friend [I’ve been requested to protect identity]: Promise me you won’t ask him okay?

Pri: Okay okay.

Random friend: So I was talking to X … just random talk about being in love with my new bag [I am so in love] when X says: Oh cool. I’m so into sling bags now. Last week I got a Louis Vuitton grey suede sling.

Random friend: Ahem ahem theoretically men+slings = metro-sexual (we like)
BUT BUT in India men+slings = homosexual

Really Pri, remember that nagging doubt we had?
Well I think is true.
The first boy I kissed is G*A*Y

Why it’s too early to make Yuvraj ‘Gaddu’ Singh captain of the Indian cricket team. [According to Soupie]

She said:

"I’m not ready to be First Lady of the Indian Cricket team [yet] for the following reasons:

1. The man who’s going to be captain doesn’t know I want to be his wife/better half [wtf with this person my half's as good as it gets]
2. We haven’t been introduced. [In other words he doesn’t know I exist]*
3. He's too young to have Yamraj [our son] who I dream will one day ‘coincide’ his test debut with his father's farewell game.
4. Umm I’m not ready to be a lady.
5. Kb hasn't graduated from Fashion School = hasn’t started making ‘tish’ first lady clothes yet = I wont be able to wear designer hats, sip tea and clap while blowing kisses = simple Kb isn’t ready to dress the Jackie O of International Cricket.
6. I will ONLY, I repeat ONLY marry the proposed captain, when there’s a good chance my friends can meet and "mingle" [freely very freely] with fellow team members which is not possible at present time.

Yeah so for now that's it. Make it a petition if you like.”

* I beg to differ Soupie. There was that one time at Spinn [when he was with that same random foreigner girl who left him waiting outside the ladies room at Insomnia] when he totally checked you out.


A few minutes later:

Soupie: I admit it's funny...the whole Gaddu thing but Pri we have to keep it a secret. What if it leaks out after I marry him? He can never find out how obsessed i was with him. It'll ruin all our chances.

Pri: I love how my friends are as delusional as i am.

All this free time and nothing to do

Now that we're out of the world cup I find myself completely bored with absolutely nothing to do. You see I had this whole month planned out and now suddenly i have all this time to catch up on movies and search for ring tones and check out upcoming Desi musicians and read marriage proposals etc...

I just discovered Pappumobile.com. Yes its a real site... for Desi ring tones. I downloaded "Chak de Phattey" from that "Khosla ka Ghosla" movie. Super fun song. I've already made my mother call me twice just so i can listen to it.

I also finally watched 'Morning Raga'. Shabana Azmi did better than i thought as a South Indian classical singer. The accent was very believable.

There's this really talented musician i recently discovered. I emailed him to ask if it was okay to play some of his music on this site and he said yes. Unfortunately i have no idea how to save it onto my Stickam player. Help! In the meanwhile you can check him out here.

One of my very silly friends made a fake profile for me without my knowledge [apparently I'm not the only one with nothing to do] on Shaadi.com and some random Srilankan singles website. I'm not sure what the profile says but I'm getting marriage proposals from random Srilankan men and women [i think they're women...i cant really tell by the names] Here are two of my most favourite emails. And to think i almost deleted them without reading them first. You'll be glad i didn't.

Hello Dear,

My name is M*****a W*******n and i am 26 years old male living in Orchard the heart city of Singapore..I saw your profile and I found it very unique and interesting and i greatly admire you and your personality, thus i decided to correspond with you asap and try to get to know you more better.
I hardly correspond with people on net but there's something about you which caught my attention and i decided to write to you in the hope that you will reply my E-mail and give me the chance to make this relationship of ours take a step further.Well, I will be eagerly waiting for your quick response and I am certain that I did make a right choice in corresponding with you.
I want to be your friend,for friendship cannot be seen or even be touched; it must be felt within the heart. I do very much believe you will feel same way. Wow, friends are like clothes, without them you feel naked! I guess am right? So please if you accept my friendship, then please reply to me and i will let you know more about me.
Looking forward for a wonderful reply from you.My E-mail address is: m***************e@aol.com
Mob: +65-********
I will be waiting to hear from you soonest.Take care of yourself and have a nice day.

Urs M*****a


Hello priya,

How are you and how is going on your works? I am L****n from srilanka(Tamil). I saw your profile in Visit Srilankan Lovers.com.I would like to reply for the ad. Do you want to know about my family and me? I am a Banker in Bank of Ceylon. I am not married. Height 5 foot 10. 25 years old. Now I am following degree in financial service. I am the only Chile in my parents my father is a business man .mother is a house wife. Other our relation in London (my mum brother family), Australia (my father one of the brother family), Swiss (my mum brother and sister) and Kandy (Gampola).Our properties in Colombo and Eastern provincial. If you accept call me +94******** or E.mail:k_l*****n@yahoo.com. I attached my pictures .can you send me your picture, contact details and May I know about your family and more details about you. What about your decision inform that me.
I expect your reply. take care bye.


Thank you
Regards
L*****n

Also it's K to the B's birthday tomorrow. Let's all wish her as she celebrates being 24! You're getting old La! If Soupie and I were closer we could've brought you real cake and sung "Hyappy Budday to You" completely off key in Filmy style but not to worry there's always high speed Internet. We'll think of some way to do eet the group celebration.

March 23rd isn't a very auspicious day for us is it?

My morning started like this:

[I was bathed and dressed by 6:45 am wearing my newly purchased tri-colour tee shirt from desithreads.com, with upma & kesaribath packed for a dozen people and on my way to watch the match when i realised i dont ever wake up early enough to see the sunrise]

and ended like this:

[on the way back home at 7:30 pm in the rain]

Yes both these pictures were taken while driving and no i'm not suicidal.

Brilliant Marketing strategy

I just read this

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Obviously these people consulted an astrologer before coming up with this marketing plan.

It's pouring outside! It never rains in Colorado. I think the whole world is crying.
Well at least 1/6th of the world.

Goodbye Inzi

So the story goes that Imran Khan first saw him when he was a young boy. He thought there was something special about him and picked him to play in the Pakistan side. Inzamam Ul Haq went on to become a brilliant batsman. I've always made fun of Inzi for his size, his expressionless face, his fielding, the stuff he mutters before the start of every presentation ceremony interview. When he announced his retirement I along with everyone else criticised his insensitive timing but today when i saw the man wiping tears from his eyes as he left the ground for the last time i felt so so sad. I watched with shock when Pakistan was eliminated from the WC and Woolmer dropped dead or was made to drop dead. I scoffed at people who said it was due to a heart attack. But it was only today that it hit me. I cant imagine what this man has gone through these last few days. A world cup surrounded with talk of murder and match fixing. Playing today's match must've been incredibly hard for him. Any batsman is emotional on his last outing in the middle but under these circumstances without even a proper farewell... i cant even imagine.
So here's to Inzi one of the greatest batsman of our generation.

We're done with winter [i think] and it's time to shop!

After bag lady left yesterday I spent the rest of the evening obsessively trying to find the Chloe bag online. In the process I ended up finding lots of cute spring/summer clothes. [I prefer not to say outfits. It’s very twelve year old girl … or seventy year old lady. Although lots of people think I sound 12. Hmm…] Anyway when I got done with work I had this sudden urge to go to the mall and so I did in spite of knowing I only had 90 minutes of shopping time. It’s not much but you’d be amazed at my time management skills when it comes to shopping.
So I go to Nordstroms and of course they’re having a shoe sale! [Apparently they knew I was coming] I did see a pair of sandals I liked but they kinda looked like some other shoes I had so I kept them aside for when I was leaving. I always park outside Nordstroms cause in case I don’t find anything else I can always find perfume or pretty sparkly earrings there [which don’t look as sparkly once you go home. It’s all in the lighting I tell you. Note to self - don’t keep falling for this.] That way I won’t feel like my shopping trip has been a complete waste of time. You know how tragic it can be when you don’t find anything.
Next I went into NY & Co. They normally have fun summer clothes and they did. I always feel bad though for the dressing room clothes refolding person so I always give them a big smile when I leave. I would not like that job. I did find the perfect summer pants. They fit perfectly and they’re light enough for summer but not too casual for work. I’m wearing them right now actually but I’m concerned they might look like scrubs. I guess it’s because they’re navy. I just asked B for her opinion and she has reassured me that they do not look like scrubs.
My last stop was Banana Republic where I found this beautiful white shirt with embroidery on it. Sort of Lucknow chicken work style but not really. I also found an adorable white denim jacket and a pretty brown summer sweater. I was very happy with myself. When I got done it was way past 9 [so much for my time management skills!] and Nordstroms had already pulled down their shutters which meant I had no idea how to get to my car. The only person I saw in the hall was creepy guy with European accent. You know the one in every mall with the hand lotion stall who tries to seduce his way into making a sale. I had no choice but to ask him where the nearest exit was. Luckily I guess he’d already packed up for the day [or maybe he thought I had gorgeous skin] anyway he didn’t try to sell me anything. I managed to get out of the building but had to walk like halfway around the mall to reach my car. All this with two humongous shopping bags [one threatening to fall apart] and my super ginormous handbag because God forbid I leave the house without everything!

And today L and I were trying to find shoes online and we came across some very hideous looking shoes. For example wtf is this? L thinks it looks like a cast.

What do you do when you're bored at work and Orkut is blocked?

Well I totally abuse the office email.


Soupie wrote:

You there psycho?

I had a near death experience.
I was drinking in a pub. The music sounded really weird, like a broken record. That continued for about half an hour. Apparently it was the f****& fire alarm. Goddamn people at the pub didn't realise. As we had it we were stuck underground as well, since the pub was called Bunker. So we evacuated with a huge uproar outside. Three fire engines dousing a fire right above us. People were crazy they carried out their drinks and were watching as if it was part of the evening entertainment.
Heeheheee... I survived and I write to tell the tale.
Aren't you glad I survived?


I wrote:

OMG YEAH I’M SO GLAD U DIDN'T DIE. I DON'T THINK I COULD TAKE IT SOUPA AFTER BOB WOOLMER’S DEATH AND ALL. IN OTHER NEWS I HAD A NEAR PANIC ATTACK MYSELF. THIS LADY CAME IN TODAY CARRYING THE MOST GORGEOUS BAG EVER. IT WAS CHLOE, THE CREAM COLOURED ONE. SUPPOSEDLY HER MOTHER IN LAW GOES TO HONGKONG ALL THE TIME AND BRINGS HER TONS OF BAGS. SHE SAID SHE WAS GOING TO GIVE IT AWAY AND SHE THOUGHT SHE WOULD WEAR IT BEFORE THAT AND SO L AND I WERE LIKE UM IF U WANT TO SELL IT WE'D BE VERY INTERESTED. IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL SOUPIE. SHE SAID SHE’D COME IN AGAIN AND BRING MORE. IT’S WEIRD THIS IS THE 2ND LADY THIS WEEK I'VE SEEN WITH A BEAUTIFUL BAG.
SO UM WHO DID U GO CLUBBING WITH? B??? [REFERRING TO OUR ONLY SEMI CELEBRITY CRICKETER FRIEND]


Soupie wrote:

Ohh that bag sounds yummy. Thanks for hiding your genuine concern about my safety. Its always comforting to know what rests in your kind heart :)
I went for drinks not clubbing. M and one of the gals from Uni who's moving to Manchester. Not B. What do I say to him if I meet him more than once a fortnight? I have to give it some time heheee....
What’s with you and KB typing a whole e-mail in caps? It’s rude!
Biatch what’s for lunch???

I wrote:

Whatever! I’m totally concerned. I’ve already told lotsa people about your near death experience. I’m even contemplating eating a donut to celebrate u not dying or getting burnt. Imagine if your hair or something caught fire. Well at least now u have something to talk to B about. Heeeeeeee. U just do drinks now eh? All grown up! I want to go home…NOW but I can’t. I’m stuck here. Forever! Why didn’t KB buy Chloe bags for us when she went to HongKong? So mean. Supposedly they’re like 20 bucks. I swear it didn’t look fake at all. It’s perfect. I’m hoping she’ll be back that lady.
I want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do u want to write about this near death experience or anything else? I’m looking for contributions for my blog. Oh no this old lady just walked up and she’s trying to make conversation with me. How do I make her leave?

Oh and do u think I’m obsessed with my blog? Like u know how KB is obsessed with teaching us the nuisances of eye shadow application and u with I don’t know googling Yuvraj and Kim Sharma pics. [Omg I typed nuisances instead of nuances and it still totally works]

Soupie wrote:

Look her deep in the eyes and tell her you find her attractive.
That'll do the trick.
Chloe bags from Hong Kong? We'll get one of the lads to bring them for us. Really!
Too much drinkin that's what's happening pri. Beer on an alternate day basis for the last 2/3 weeks. That's what's gonna lead to me writing "How to grow a pot belly" memoir. While you’re at it eat a lemon poppy seed muffin. They can be your best friends when your human best friends aren't around.
Hee heee
Also in the same aisle a few other friends to look out for.
Carrot cake with cream cheese frosting(I esp love it cause it sounds like a health bar) uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

I wrote:

Um lads? What lads? And who says lads anymore? You sound so British!!!

Soupie wrote:

Lads = not boy not man yet.
It’s a good word Pri really!
What was buddi's reaction????

I wrote:

Um how does carrot cake with cream cheese frosting sound like a health bar? Carrot should never be mixed with cake. Gross. Imagine like ladies finger cake or like paavakka [bitter gourd] cake? Oh also never ever say ladies finger in America. They look at u kinda strange.

Soupie wrote:

Carrot cake is yummy. I swear on Corner House's Brownie fudge sundae and pineapple passion. Emmethika people call it Okra no?
So dumb!

I wrote:

Buddi left with her oxygen tank. Boss also left for the day. I’m super happy!

Soupie wrote:

Is this the boss from some weird African country????
Ugh I have to do my weekly obligatory talk to P soon. So annoying!

I wrote:
UM THAT WAS THIS OTHER LADY, NOT MY BOSS! AND IVE TOLD U THIS LIKE 400 TIMES. BOSNIA IS IN EUROPE NOT AFRICA!


Wow and before I knew it it was time to go home. :)

Just do it India!

If you don't live in India you've probably never seen this ad. Just a little something to cheeer you up after one of the saddest weekends in International cricket.
[Dont forget to turn off the stickem player at the bottom of the page so you can hear the audio]

Phone calls from friends after the first match

Kb: What the fuck just happened Pri? And who is this next team we're playing? Brrr?
Pri: Eh?
Kb: Yeah yeah i just checked the schedule and it says India is playing brrr.
Pri: Oh u mean B E R? Um kb that would stand for Bermuda.
Kb: Eh? Now Bermuda triangle also sends team to WC aa? Hmmm do u think we can beat them?
Pri: Ya kb we're not that bad! [secretly hoping she doesn't have to eat her words in 2 days]

Sid: So my mum and I were discussing our pathetic performance after the match and then my phone rings and i was like who is this calling from some 4 digit number. Nodidre it was this annoying recorded message from Sachin Tendulkar saying Cheer for India or some crap.
Pri: Wat? OMG! The airtel one?
Sid: Yeah
Pri: Talk about timing
Sid: Ya da the last time i got one of those it was Atal Bihari Vajpaaye asking for my vote.

We just lost to a B grade team filled with a bunch of teenagers with really really bad teeth.

We just lost to a B grade team filled with a bunch of teenagers with really really bad teeth. As T very politically correctly put it earlier today "Abe yaar Bangladesh hi to hain. They have floods throughout the year. No food nothing. The whole country is starving. Don't worry yaar they can never beat us". If you're trying to find the logic in this statement don't bother because there is none much like Dravid's strategy today. Let's see what he did right. Well there was the winning of the toss. I'll give him that. He did that very well. Now for the things he did wrong - Karthik has been in amazing form so he drops him and picks Veeru our IN FORM batsman! Uthappa and Dada have been a good opening pair in the recent past but of course Veeru was made to open. And what a splendid job he did! Kumble watched the game from the dressing room while Bhajji [who hasn't taken a wicket since the last century no seriously since the last century, think about it] was on the field doing what he does best...Nothing! Oh and everybody's favourite ALL ROUNDER Ajit Agarkar was picked ahead of Sreesanth and Pathan. Patel [our best bowler in the warm up matches] was made to bowl first change while Agarkar got to open the bowling with Zak. Now Agarkar as we all know is an ALL ROUNDER. Ahem so he got to bat ahead of Zak. And you know who got to bat ahead of them both? Why of course out favourite Bhajji bhaiyya. Oh and Munaf Patel hit a four today. Yeah he managed to connect the bat to the ball and then actually hit it and it reached the ropes. I don't know how it all came together but he did it. I felt like a proud mother. Actually never mind. My kid could never be that ugly. Although Patel does look less ugly since he cut off his goldie locks. Oh and while i was watching the splendid game i had to also listen to my annoying friend ask me lame questions like "Do you think the match has been fixed?" and "Who is winning now?" and "What will you guys do if India loses today?" followed by high pitched giggling. I had very very violent thoughts of what i wanted do to her but i sat quiet and ate my butta which was delicious by the way with lots of salt and chilli powder and lime. Anyway i know this match sucked big time [but hey at least we didn't lose to Ireland. I still cant believe Pakistan is out of the WC] but let's look at the positives. It's a loud wake up call for India nice and early. We always do this [remember the '99 WC and the '03 WC?] but we always scrape through to the next round. Hopefully this will teach Dravid and Chappal who not to pick and who not to send where. By the by Where's Vengsarkar? I'm still hoping he gets really mad after today and decides to fire Chappal on the spot and reinstate Dada as captain. They can even hire John Wright back as temporary coach since he's right there trying his level best to do decent commentary. He's not very good at it. His book on the other hand is lovely. If we want to win this world cup we need to pick our strongest team which would be: Dada, Uthappa, Dravid, Sachin, Yuvi, Karthik, Dhoni, Zaheer, Pathan or Sreesanth, Kumble, Munaf Patel and in that order. Look our tail now looks way more decent. If you're not into cricket [i don't know why you'd still be reading this] but the whole tail thing is cricket related so don't raise your eyebrows at me. Oh and don't forget to pray especially on the 19th and the 23rd. It could determine the fate of 15 people. They might never be allowed into India again. .
Also whats with the energy level on the ground? Someone please hand our useless captain and his favourite fast bowler Agarkar some high energy drink and Yuvraj some coffee. Did anyone else catch him yawning on the ground today?
By the by who's adopting the Pakistan team? They have no home the poor souls.

I'm just a wee bit tipsy...

So I've been drinking again. You know to um celebrate the World Cup. Look the drinks are even Team India coloured.





K i think i'm going to go to bed. I have to wake up at 7am to watch the first match. Dont u just love World cup time?

ML tries to watch a YouTube video

ML: What ‘muffin’ video do you guys keep talking about?

P: Okay go to google

ML [looking very confused]: Um Google?

P: Yeah. Do you know how to go to Google?

2 minutes later

ML: Yeah I’m on Google.

B: Okay now type in www.youtube.com

ML somehow gets onto www.Uube.com

B and P cracking up: No no not ‘uube’ – ‘youtube’

ML is now on www.Tube.com

B: No no ML. It’s Youtube

ML types in www.youtube

ML: Nothings happening.

B: Um you have to type in the .com part

ML: Oh okay. Is this it?

B: [giggling hysterically]: OMG I think I have to pee

P: Okay. Now search for muffins

ML: Where do I search?

B: You see that white rectangle? Type ‘muffins’ in there

P: Okay now click on the first video.

ML clicks on second video [which luckily happens to be the same as the first] and proceeds to watch the first whole minute with no volume.

Bag spotting and soufflé making

L: Did u see that lady’s bag?
P: No. Why? Is it nice or ugly?
L: Ooh it’s nice.

I walk over to B’s office pretending to look for something

B [in uncalled for grumpy voice]: What do you want?
P: Nothing. I just came over here so I can walk back and check out that lady’s bag. So this is a fake conversation.
B: What lady?
B: Oh did I tell you I hate my job?
P: Yeah. Me too

I walk back casually glancing in bag lady’s direction.

L: Did you see?

Mmm hmmm, I nod approvingly.

L: Where do you think it’s from?
P: I don’t know but it’s fabulous [I say, sounding very Jay Manuelesque*]
L: Would it will be weird if I asked her where she got it?
P: No. But pretend you just saw it and you love it.
L: Okay

I walk back to my seat all satisfied with my grand accomplishment for the morning.

It’s been a half hour and I’m still dreaming about the bag.

I WANT IT!!!

I would also like to announce that I was tricked [by my mother] into making five large trays of pineapple soufflé last night. Originally I was going to make one tray which then became two and then three and then five. I felt like a freakin caterer. 40 eggs were used in the process. 40! But I did feel all professional when I got done. I gloated to Soupie [who taught me how to make it] about it and she was very proud of me. It’s the only thing I can make but I make it well. Don’t tell her but I think my soufflé is better than hers.



Voila!

this is the sad me
the sad me stares at the computer screen for hours
the sad me has a very lame life
the sad me is brilliant at being fake happy
the sad me cant even write a 55 word story
because the story isn't really fiction
the sad me is the real me

Flashback - ICC World Cup 2003

India vs Australia - I knew this game would be crucial. If we could beat them we had a chance at the cup. 'Psychological advantage' i had said. After we lost [and how!] i conveniently changed my thought process to "Oh well we cant win everything, but we'll win the finals".
India vs. Pakistan was awesome. "We can totally chase that score" i remember telling Soupie but honestly i was terrified. India chasing anything over 220? Really?
I remember India vs. England well. Kb and i were talking on the phone during the lunch interval and when we got off the phone England had already lost a couple of wickets. This was the only game i saw Ashish 'cut piece' Nehra do something special. The other time was at F-Bar when he was trying to um dance.
I remember Dada's reaction when he found out we'd be playing Kenya in the semi- finals. Classic.
But most of all i remember the finals. March 23rd 2003. It was dad's birthday which meant the entire extended family showed up for lunch. Now one thing i really really detest is watching cricket in the company of annoying 'know it all' unclejees with no table manners. Soupie and i had made a birthday cake for dad. It was in the shape of a cricket bat [a ready made loaf cake with two break chocolates attached to it for the handle, iced not very neatly] There was other cake too of course [Chocolate Mousse cake from Sweet Chariot to be precise. Mmmmm *Pri thinks happy thoughts*] since nobody was brave enough to eat anything i had any hand in making/arranging. My plan was to get everyone to eat lunch and leave as soon as possible. But you know how it is with families and Sunday luncheons. And so they hung out for so effing long. I was getting madder by the minute. For starters Dada won the toss [which i had prayed for so so much] and then decided to field. Who fields first in the finals of a world cup? Huh? But since it was Dada i figured he knew what he was doing. Then they go and play the National Anthem. I was very teary eyed. Apparently i wasn't the only one. Zak looked a leetle too over enthusiastic. That first over was the longest over i can remember to date. The unclejees commenting and cursing around me didn't help matters. Brown jacket wanted half a cup of water. Later he also asked for half a cup of tea. What is it with unclejees who ask for half a cup? I don't see them asking for half a cup of whiskey. Now brown jacket is a very interesting character. I still have no idea how were related. He is called Brown Jacket because well he always wears this really ugly brown jacket. He has written many books...none of which are any good. He also likes to imagine he has invented something and then tries to patent it. It would be a little sad if it wasn't so bloody funny. Anyway Brown Jacket was sitting on my couch in my lucky spot [of course i had a lucky spot!] asking for half cups of random liquids and basically yelling at every Indian bowler/fielder. Now I'm very protective about my team. No one has the right to say anything about them [well no one except me] so you can imagine my frustration. Anyway the crowd [in my house] finally started to leave towards the end of the Australian innings. I was tired but relieved to have my couch back. I knew at this point we had practically lost the game. Partly due to this realisation [and also from watching Mandira Body make sad faces at the camera] i decided to lock myself in my room where i cried for about 20 minutes straight. This match meant the world to me and i knew there was a very small chance we could win. After the bawling i washed my face and went out all brave and with new found determination [chap stick, water bottle and cell phone in tow] rosary in track pant pocket [shhh no one needs to know about it] I truly believed we could win. I could feel it. And then Sachin failed again [like he does so often in big finals] and soon all my boys started to walk back to the dressing room one after the other. They said it might rain and it did for a bit. How i wished the match would be washed out and replayed the next day. It didn't happen and we lost [by a lot]. I wore black for a week. The only thing that motivated me to wake up the next morning was the leftover chocolate mousse cake.
But this year were going to win. I can feel it. There isn't even a Sweet Chariot cafe nearby and American cake [surprisingly] isn't half as good!

P.S. I finally got the okay from my boss to take half-days for all of India's matches. Not that he really could've prevented me. I wouldn't miss this World Cup for the world!

Hello World

I just watched Dada's interview at Eden Gardens on NDTV. It was very emotional. I may have cried a little.

I also saw an Ashley Judd interview [also on NDTV] where she had tears in her eyes. She claimed it was because she was going to go see Gandhi's house. I think the person interviewing her was as confused as i am.

I would also like to announce that i cleaned my room. I will have to clean it again in a couple of weeks cause duh it will be messy again but also because my aunt [who loves to wear old lady perfume] and gay cousin [who doesn't quite know he's gay yet] are coming to visit ... for 4 days! I will of course have to drive them around/entertain them/make pineapple souffle [cause that is all i can make] and generally make pleasant conversation ... for 4 days! My announcing the cleaning of my room [which i realise you probably could've done without hearing] might have something to do with Bharath's very very rude comment the other day. I quote "You really think people are interested in you washing your car?" You will be happy to know Bharath has been officially banned from reading this blog.

I would also like to inform you that it's raining outside right now. This is one of the million things i miss about my Bangalore. It never rains here. Snow we get. Lots of it. But very little rain. Okay now that we've talked about the weather lets move on.

This is a picture of some of the things my mommy brought me from India. I had it all spread out and thought it looked so colourful. [Soupie, Kb i hear collective gasps from the two of you. I promise not to go crazy with the colourful fonts now that I've discovered how to use them.]

I have been shocked [but happy] to note that all of a sudden lots of people [well more than 2 at least] have been reading my blog. Yay!!! Anyway what is even more amazing is some of their locations. Sweden? Mexico? Lots of people in China? Italy? Germany? Denmark? Spain? Poland? France? Singapore [and it's not even you Kb] Japan? I mean I'm excited and all but WTF? I'm world famous!!! I'm assuming most of you are Desis who live in these places. So to you guys and of course everyone from India and USA - Welcome jee Welcome! Leave me comments so i know you're real. K?

Also who here thinks the music on this page should be taken off? [Bharath your opinion doesn't count]

And can anyone help me fix the 'blogroll me' button on my blog? It doesnt work. Oh and this is not me asking you to blog roll me. The button seriously doesn't work and i can't fix it :(

Eavesdropping can be so much fun

Overheard at a public restroom

Kid number 1: Rachel?

10 seconds later

Rachel [also known as Kid no 2]: Ya
Kn1: Why are you taking so long?
R: Um cause
Kn1: Hurry up!
R: K
Kn1: Rachel
R: Yaa
Kn1: I’m gonna go outside. K?
R: K
R: Emily!
Kn1: Wahat?
R: I won’t know where you are
Kn1: mmm I’ll be near the card section
R: What card section?
Kn1: cards… you know.. like birthday cards
R:K
Kn1:K

Overheard at the bank

Guy: Hey you know that girl at school who got a sex change?
Girl: Ya
Guy: You sorta look like the boy version of her.
Girl: Oh please. I didn’t cut it that short

Also overheard at the bank:

Lady: Nicole honey where's your scrunchie?
Nicole: I dont know
L: Was that what you were chewing on earlier?
N: No
L: Nicole!
L: Was it?
N: Ya [makes sad face]

This is exactly what you want to see!

I realise it's just a practice match but it's still vs. West Indies in the West Indies.

Car Wash Adventures

Remember how I said my car really really needed to be washed? Well I got it washed today at one of those automatic car wash places. You know, the ones you’ve seen in the movies where all the making out takes place. Anyway this was my first time...not making out...just using the car wash place. I normally take it to a different place and I hand a guy my keys and my car comes out all clean and shiny. This time it wasn’t so easy. I drove up to the entrance and inserted a $5 bill and this voice said “your wash is now ready”. I was about to drive in when I saw the big sign about making sure the antenna was down and the side windows turned in. So I got out of my car and ran around trying to do all of this before I completely missed the car wash. Then I drove in slowly and nothing happened so I kept driving until I heard this loud alarm and saw this big STOP light blinking. So I stopped. Still nothing. Then I drove backwards and I noticed this car behind me near the entrance. So I drove forward again and again the bloody alarms went off. Then this light came on that said I had to go back to start the cycle and so I did. Still nothing. The lady in the car behind me was now making angry signs. So I drove out and went to talk to the person inside the gas station. At first she looked at me kind of strange and then she handed me a coupon. She didn’t say anything the whole time. She pointed at this code so I figured I needed to enter that in. So I tried again. This time it didn’t even ask me for a payment. It said “your deluxe car wash is now ready”. I had only paid for a regular one so I’m guessing impatient lady behind me got the car wash I had ordered and I got her deluxe one. Muahahahahaha. So I drove in again and this time I at least saw some water. It wasn’t anywhere near my car but at least I saw the bloody water. So I drove backwards till the water was now splashing on top of my car. Then it stopped and I looked around [like that was going to help me] for any sign of a human being. Then all of a sudden I couldn’t see anything. I was scared and took my sun glasses off [which I realise I probably shouldn’t have been wearing inside anyway] but I still couldn’t see anything. That was when it dawned on me that the car wash had now started working. The soap was what was blinding me. DUH! And then for the next five minutes I felt like I was in a tornado. The force of the water was way stronger than I expected. My front glass has this crack in it and I was terrified of the water gushing in. I imagined dying in there. “Well she did always love taking a bath”, they would say at my funeral. Just when I thought I was all done my car was covered with this strange pink/purple gooey thing . I’m not sure what it was [ooh maybe it was the deluxe part of the deluxe car wash] and then more water. First like a drizzle, then like this giant wave, then more drizzle. I was giggling by now like an eight year old on her first roller coaster ride. Eventually I was done but see I didn’t know I was done because my car was still wet and I was expecting some sort of air to you know blow dry it [can one blow dry a car or is that only for hair?] but nothing. So I drove off a little mad and then right at the exit of course theres this huge gust of wind and then I was all dry and clean and shiny and happy and laughing like a crazy person.


Oh and on a completely unrelated note we're having a rather scary day at work. Scary because there was this computer error thing that affected a bunch of people who are now super mad and could potentially sue us. So the phone has been ringing non stop all day and everyone is really really frustrated. I have been a little too upbeat i think for this sort of a day. I'm trying to sound a little more somber when i answer the phone but i keep forgetting. Anyway about twenty minutes ago this guy dropped off this box. I signed for it but i'm scared to open it. I think it might have been sent by an angry person. So if you never hear from me again you'll know why.

Can you tell i like my camera phone?

Strange object i saw in the sky



Balloons at work



Tiny cupcake in Really big [but pretty] box. I hate it when they dont have banana bread at starbucks!



Picture i found in random magazine of my old music teacher from school. Apparently he now thinks he's Yanni! [and yes that is my nail and no i'm not wearing black polish...it's dark purple and no i'm not into goth]

Co-workers gone wild

Okay remember Dull girl C? You know the one i thought i had gotten rid off? Well the thing is she hasn't quit the company. She just works at a different department. She still emails me all day everyday on the office email. I still have nothing to say to her. She has nothing to say either but still manages to fill up a decent sized paragraph all perfectly punctuated and spaced nice and neat. It drives me insane. Anyway we have this annual lunch thingy with the CEO on our respective anniversaries with the company. Unfortunately for me C and i both started working around the same time and so we always have to go to these things together. This time i got lucky (or so i thought) and was not invited on the same day she was. Yesterday C noticing my name was missing on the list sends me a frantic email saying i had to immediately inform the person who committed this heinous blunder. I tell C i should probably wait to see if i get an invitation for another day. Today C emails me saying i should act fast because one date is almost completely booked. Then she wants to know if she should email the person in charge and request for us to be assigned on the same date. Again very politely i tell her not to say anything because i hadn't gotten an invitation yet. Next thing i know C says shes going to send an email anyway and two minutes later i receive a copy of the email. I don't know whether to bitch slap her or run her over with my car. [That reminds me i really need to get my car washed. I havent washed it in over 4 months. Dont judge me. It was because of all the snow. Now it looks like it just survived a bomb blast. This weekend ill take it in for sure] My concern is that 'lady in charge of lunch thingy' probably thinks I'm really greedy or even worse she probably thinks C and I are best friends. Me thinks she might even arrange for us to sit together. Ughhhhhhh!!!!

Then there's this other dude who i like to call Retardo [not just because his name rhymes with it] who i would like to throw something at. Preferably something sharp [pun intended] So the boy has been told over and over again how certain things are not to be done but still does it. I don't know what to do anymore. I have tried leaving helpful notes. I have explained [in great detail] everything [with demonstrations] over and over but he does not get it. Ugh!!!!!!
Fire him already!!!

And then there's L and B who i love so very much who make the work day go by so much faster. And no I'm not just saying that because i know B reads my blog. Anyway earlier this week i made them watch these videos which they enjoyed very much but for some reason both of them thought the people in the video were Indian. For the record the 'people' shown in the video happens to be just one girl [she's multi talented] and she's Korean. Now i could see them confusing a Korean person and say a Japanese person. But an Indian person? How do you confuse a Korean and an Indian? If Sandra Oh on Greys Anatomy and the Indian girl (Parminder Nagra?) on ER switched places for an episode would they not spot the difference?

Paah!

I just wanted to tell you about it. [Hardly a review]

I was flipping channels tonight and managed to catch the last half hour of this Persian movie. Its about these two kids who love shoes. And well they're poor and so they go looking for shoes. [I think. Like i said i watched only the last half hour]. There's a little girl who walks home with her friend after school and she sees that her friend is wearing new shoes. She wants to know where her old shoes are and gets really upset when she finds out they were thrown away. Meanwhile her brother sees this poster about a marathon and the third prize happens to be a pair of sneakers. So he goes to the coach and begs him to let him take part. As expected the coach acts like a big jerk but eventually agrees [once little boy has started to cry and beg]. So the kid goes home and tells his sister about the race promising to give her the sneakers if he wins...something about him having lost a pair of her shoes earlier. During the race [shot very realistically] the boy actually does pretty good. At one point he even reaches third place and this little brat behind him pushes him. I was reminded for a second of Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikander. Anyway little boy gets up and starts running again and he manages to win the race. Of course hes too exhausted to realise he won and the first question he asks the coach when he looks up is "Did i come third?" Hes crushed when he is told he came first. Next there's this adorable scene in the movie where the photographer is taking a picture of him with his medal and he refuses to look up. When he is finally made to look up his eyes are filled with tears. When he goes home the sister sees him in the same old worn out pair of shoes and knowing he didn't win the sneakers walks off. The next part is a little exaggerated where the kid takes off his shoes and the rubber is all torn off and his feet are really bruised and then he puts his feet in a little pond and the gold fish nibble at it. I'm not sure what for. Anyway I'm going to watch the rest of the movie when it repeats tomorrow on IFC so maybe ill find out. It really moved me this sweet little movie. Especially the race sequence where they show the entire freaking race but it feels so real and the kids are adorable. So if you're in the mood for a heart breaking short movie watch Children of Heaven.


edited at 12:44 pm: Oh no!!! i just realised i forgot to set my recorder. im going to miss the first part of my movie. boo hoo!

Gtalk talk 3

So me thinks the whole putting Gtalk conversation here has been a super duper idea. If u haven't liked the first two chances are u wont like this one. Now i do realise they're silly but they're funny silly. hmmm i should totally do like a reader survey thingy no since u don't believe in leaving comments for me u horrible horrible lazy ass people!

Just to give u some background. I have these two friends who i love oh so much. You've probably heard their names before. There's Kb who lives in Singapore (budding fashion designer and all..budding what the hell kind of word is budding?) and then there's Soupie who lives in London (budding journalist. fine i used it again but its better than saying wannabe). We miss each other so so much and when one is super busy with work or ones laptop is taken for repairs and returned only after 3 months its hard for us cause we cant do our daily online bitching sessions. I still don't know how the girl survived without her laptop for that long. I would've killed myself. I think i might want to be buried with my laptop when i die :)


Kavya: hi pri
priya: oh look its bugger mane
Kavya: heheheh im dying
priya: wtf? u rose from the dead eh?
priya: soupie and me were about to dispatch a search team
Kavya: i got reserected
hhehehhe pls pls do and also find people who can draw and sew
priya: filled mostly with creepy gowda boys with large ahem estates
Kavya: tuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
priya: um kb only u can make a typo sound horny
Kavya: heheeh
priya: res erected? its resurrected
gross!
Kavya: watever! dictionary!
ur de pervert
priya: so we ... as in ure two best friends in the whole wide world have decided to call a group meeting
Kavya: i have my collecdtion presentation tomo
wen wen
priya: this tuesday at 8 am my time
Kavya: im not here for a week
priya: wtf?
Kavya: hello thats today
for me
priya: um tuesday is today?
wow ure seriously tired no?
Kavya: oh then it will be wed for me
ehhehhe ess ya
priya: huh?
Kavya: my mind is not working properly
heheheheh
priya: k tuesday 8:30 pm india time is wat 10:30 pm for u no?
Kavya: ess
priya: this tuesday not possible aa?
Kavya: but i will be just returning from college
after my presentation
priya: so? u need time to meditate?
Kavya: hmmmm may be i'll still be alive
priya: paah!
soupie and i were just discussing how dissapointed we are in u.
heeeee no we werent
Kavya: why?
priya: wats with all this working so hard i say?
Kavya: ahem
Kavya: see i have to make designs for my final collection
Kavya: and tomo is the presentation
Kavya: I can come but ill be an hour late at 11:30?
priya: No. cause thats when i take my snaana.
i guess i could take snaana at 8 uh
Kavya: y u going for snaana?
priya: fine 11:30 pm singapore time naale. vokai beta?
no not now
but most days i like to take a shower before i leave for work
Kavya: vokai
riya: u should try it too
Kavya: ohhhh like that
priya: k. i will dispatch the msg to soupie
Kavya: ess
but u know
priya: i dunno why im saying dispatch so much
i know
Kavya: i spoke to her day before yest
priya: so lucky!
yes i heard
Kavya: heheeh
priya: i spoke with her face to face over high speed internet
Kavya: i knw and my internet was also fine
hehhe i saw de face
priya: she has web cam now
i also saw her room
Kavya: but it didn move much
priya: bed
toilet
Kavya: oooooo
and?
priya: and the street outside her house
Kavya: heheeh and de guy who stares at her?
priya: i saw british cars zooming by
Kavya: wah re wah
so lucky
priya: i got a tour
did u get a tour?
haah! she loves me more
Kavya: no pri my internet doesnt support that
priya: huh?
Kavya: ahem we spoke for a loooong time
priya: wat do u mean?
watever
Kavya: My internet is slow no
Kavya: its stolen. wat more can i expect from eet
Kavya: Oh and pri i finally got the shirts. i looooooooooooooooooovvvvvveeeeeeee them
they r soooooo cute
priya: oh yay!!!!
Kavya: ur de best!!!!!!!
priya: im glad u like them
but i thought they were a bit tight for u
Kavya: ehhh no problem... i did some stretch exercises
priya: as in?
u worked out?
Kavya: no no i just stretched de shirts....hhehehhehe
priya: heeeeeeeeeee
omg!
Kavya: they became fatter for me!!!!!!!!
priya: but sunnu didnt like them no?
Kavya: ya ya....
she said they look faded
hehehehhehhehehhehheheh
priya: omg! shes so lame
theyre vintage damn it!
Kavya: hehhehehheh
eh im going to hong kong on thursday
to buy fabrics for the fashion show
priya: omg! u now travel out of the country to buy fabric?
Kavya: oh and pri i think i'm going to need to buy a gas mask that puffs purfume
priya: wat the fuck for?
Kavya:because imallergic to chinese food smell
Kavya: hehehhe
priya: how can u be allergic to chinese food smell? u live in singapore!
Kavya: heehhe i dont breathe when i pass a food court